Husband 1.0

My mom sent me this email and I laughed. A lot. Cute, enjoy!

Subject: Letter to Tech Support
Date: Mon, 19 Oct 2009 20:42:59 -0400

Letter to Tech Support:

Title: INSTALLING HUSBAND 1.0

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate.



Response from Tech Support:

DEAR DESPERATE,

First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html, try to download Tears 6.2, and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If those applications work as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta. Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0- program. This is an unsupported application and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck!
Tech Support

Bye Bye, Wisdoms!

[Psst. There's an award at the end of this :) ]

'Tis true! I had all four of my wisdom teeth cut out this morning. I honestly feel quite fine, but the numbness on the inside of my mouth is just now starting to where off, so I'm sure my opinion will change before two long. The numbness on the outside of my face is still there. On one side of my face it's numb all the way to my temple and over a bit into my hairline...I find that odd haha.

They gave me the "good drugs," but I learned the last time I had knee surgery (erm, fall of 2007 I think?) that I do not do well on these things. They make me pretty sick. So by the end of tomorrow I'll probably be done taking them--so far, I've only had one!

And just for the record, I should say, that laughing gas...really only makes you laugh when your 6. When your an adult, all you want to say is "there's nothing funny here..." it also seemed a bit unnecessary, since they immediately IVed me and used IV drugs to put me out anyway?? Eh, it's all good. I'm not as swollen, at least right now, as I thought I'd be. I may be worse tomorrow, but today I pretty much look normal on the outside. I'll be back to my normal self completely soon and I'm already bored so...maybe my house will be cleaned before i go back to work and class? Ha!

Anyway, Kreativ Blogger!



I was given this award this week by Hannah at That [Officer's] Wife AND Jess at Jesstagirl and her Officer! These are both wonderful bloggy-ladies and I'm lucky to have found them! Thanks girls!

Here are the rules:

1.) Thank the person who gave this to you!
2.) Copy the logo and place it in your blog!
3.) Link the person who nominated you!
4.) Name 7 things about yourself that no one would really know.
5.) Nominate 7 Kreativ Bloggers.
6.) Post links to the 7 blogs you nominate.
7.) Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know you nominated them!


1. I will go to O'Charleys and order a house salad and a "couple rolls with butter" to go. It's amazing, and costs less than Wendy's.
2. I have an addiction to shopping for dogs on petfinder. We can't get one now, and for at least a year after the wedding and maybe even longer depending on where we end up living, but I stinking LOVE looking for dogs. And not puppies, rescues. I would take Ava home in a second.
3. I get a lot of compliments on my engagement ring. It really does sparkle, and I love it. But everytime someone says "I LOVE your ring!" I take it as a compliment in our relationship rather than the ring and I smile just thinking about B.
4. I have to find a halloween costume for this year still. We are allowed to dress up at work if you work that day. If I don't, I was invited to two parties--I love costumes, but I don't find any want to dress up on one of those slutty costumes all the women seem to find amazing these days. I don't care who you ask, Raggedy Ann never wore a belly shirt.
5. I am thoroughly addicted to winter hats. I have a MILLION of them. I wear them maybe 10 times total, because they give me hat hair. But I love them and I continue to buy them.
6. I love art. I considered going to school for art education for a long time. Until my common sense laughed in my face and said "yea, good luck finding a job."
7. Katherine Heigl is no longer on my "ew" list, which she joined after bitching for more money on Grey's. She was relieved from her position on the "ew" list when she adopted a special needs baby. Yay Naleigh!


The nominees are:
jlc from French Kiss
Kat at Mama Kat's Losin It
New Girl at New Girl on Post
d.a.r. at Just Another Day
hilary at High Heels & Combat Boots
Jessi at Welcome to the Zoo
Lindsay at And we'll just laugh along the way...

Enjoy Ladies!

Where the Crap is that Parking Lot??

The walk was amazing. We had 13 people signed up. We had 10 and two kids show up. More than last year, but not as many as we were expecting.

Last years walk was 61,000 people strong. I'd like to take the opportunity to mention that the entire population of the city we will be moving too is 53,000. Oh Wyoming! The numbers haven't come in yet from this years walk!

My mom decided she was joining us, and that was fantastic! She was nervous she wouldn't be able to make it all 5 miles, especially with B's mom there and her wanting to make a "good impression" to all people not related to us. But she did fine--better than me, actually. Sad, and so freakin' true. Would have been much better if it weren't 40 degrees out and we hadn't parked a mile away this year. Ha! But downtown at sunrise is absolutely gorgeous, so it was fantastic photo-taking time!

A few photos:
Me and Mom

Wall of people for as far as you could see.

The group.

View of the finish-area from the other side of the river.

Awesome little dog. So many people brought their pets. They were cute, but it makes me wonder if their owners can read "no pets of bicycles." We did wonder about rollerblades, though.

The bottom of a ferrywheel, which for whatever reason is suspended in the air.


Then we came home and cleaned out the storage closet and threw out TONS of stuff. So exciting!

And then we woke up on Monday and couldn't move. But it was totally worth it :)

Making Strides for Mom!

October, as we all know from the obsessive amount of pink absolutely everywhere, is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. 13% of all women, 1 in 8, will be diagnosed with breast cancer in their lifetime. About 42,000 women will die this year from breast cancer.

My mother beat the odds.


She was diagnosed last summer, and has made it through chemo and radiation and has come out cancer-free! Along with her, my grandmother, stepmother, aunt, and my mother's best friend have all fought the disease and all but one (my aunt) won the fight!

So last year we decided we would take part in the American Cancer Society's Making Strides Against Breast Cancer walk! The walk is 5 miles and a fabulous way to raise money for research. Last year there were 60,000+ walkers just in our city!

You can find my fundraising page at the ACS website if you'd like to know more about why I'm walking, donate, or even join a walk near you! We walk as a team as well, and have 13 people signed up, but will have some stragglers with us that day as well!



When many people band together for results, fantastic results come out of it!

Wedding Bells Agenda

There has been some serious movement on the wedding front!

Recent happenin's:

-Ordered wedding dress
-Booked DJ
-Booked Photographer
-Met with caterer, chose menu
-Set up account for the bridesmaids dresses
-Started on bridesmaid gifts
-Chose flowergirl dresses ($60+free shipping? heck yes! click here to see them. they're copyrighted, so I can't post the picture :( they'll of course be ivory with a navy sash and flower petals)
-Picked up the first pack of invitations. At-home prints, just checking to make sure the printer can handle it. [$125 for at home vs. $500+ for ordered? Yes, I'll take it!)
Imagine these in light blue, and that's what they are...


Next up:
-Meeting with deacon for survey and meeting
-Book ceremony music
-Deposit to caterer
-deposit for the photobooth

We've found some awesome buys lately too that are on the "to get" list for the next 7 months:
-37" LCD tv, under $500
-Awesome tiny vacuum, $100
-Cherry TV stand, usually $300, for $100

-and personally, I really need a pair of black shoes that aren't homecoming-esque or flipflops...

I realize that I never keep you guys updated with this stuff. I also realize that most of you don't really care about this boring stuff so I don't worry too much about it :)

The Cactus Cuties

These tiny little girls are absolutely amazing! They are only 6, 7 and 8 years old!

You Can't Have Him

My grandmother is not a soft spoken woman. She tells it like it is (or like she thinks it is) no matter what the situation. My grandmother is also not someone who lives an hour away and who we never see. She lives two houses away, and I grew up in her house-from 7am to 7pm-even occasionally living there. She fixes my clothes and sews things on B's uniforms. I take her dog out and drive her places when she doesn't feel like driving herself.

When B and I first started dating, she was very concerned with his military-ness. Which, honestly, I find rather odd since my grandpa was in the Air Force and she was a military wife. But, he did his four years and left. B is, at the current moment, planning on 20 years. A lot of what she says is very defensive--she doesn't want you to know what's really going on, so she yells at you instead. I heard a lot of "you don't want to do that" "why would you want to do that" "you're going to be miserable" "you'll never be able to do it." (She loves me, I swear, but she always thinks she knows what's best. If I had broken it off with him because of the military, she would have yelled at me for that too.)

But this week I told her we were stationed in Wyoming.
She didn't yell at me.
Through tearing eyes, all she said was "...I thought it wasn't supposed to be that far."

So, needless to say, my weeks been kind of...eh. And I've been really worried about leaving our families.

But tonight I came home from class and found two bars of Dove Milk Chocolate (THE BEST ever chocolate!) and a card on my desk. The inside of it had no typed phrases, no goofy love quote, and nothing hallmark. But, it had two pages of writing from B. Two perfect pages of exactly what I needed to hear this week. Exactly.



Be jealous.

Just Woah [End Scene]

Do you remember this post? The one where B got his job and we ranked our top six bases?

On our list was: Georgia, Delaware, Maryland, New Jersey, California and Louisiana.

We found out through ways that we won't discuss (completely at no fault to us) last week that we were stationed. But, we wanted to wait until this week when B was officially told where we were going to say anything.

So where are we going? Georgia? Delaware? California?

No.

Wyoming.



F.E. Warren in Cheyenne, to be exact. A missile base with no runway. In Wyoming.

I'm not going to complain--I'm just going to accept that although the air force said "rank your top 6" and had six good choices but chose somewhere not even relatively close to any of those we ranked, it's not like we can change it. So we're going to Wyoming. And buying a horse (that is the only way to fit in there, right?). I'm also fairly certain I'm going to need more scarves, coats, and gloves.

But I do have one question: is it wrong to name a child Cheyenne if you live in Cheyenne?

I think we'll have to learn how to ski. It's a crime not to know if you live that close to Colorado, right? What is there to do/see in Wyoming or Colorado? Because you can bet we're going to be planning some trips!

The only part I will complain about is that now I'll have to wait 2 hours after everyone else to see my favorite shows :( Geeze I'm a junkie. But, I do worry about being 19 hours from all we've ever known. Georgia was at least a familiar state, and only 9 hours. I drove through Wyoming once when I was 7, and B's never been anywhere out west, and that's basically all our experience with that area. But we'll live :)

Turkey Meatball Heroes

It is no secret that I love to bake. Cupcakes, cakes, pie, bread...anything horrible for you and completely unnecessary to a meal is right up my alley. But cooking a meal? I don't do that very often. It's probably been 4-5 months since I've "made" a meal (unless you include dialing Marco's Pizza or microwaving things). The problem I have with it is that I don't like doing the same recipe multiple times. The problem I have with using a new recipe every time is that I can't afford to buy extra ingredients that I don't usually keep. But, this week in my Family Circle magazine (shut up, you know you like it too), a particular recipe caught my eye: Turkey Meatball Heroes.

I'm a big fan of anything made with ground turkey instead of ground beef. It's a million times better for you. And, I don't know how it is in your house, but in my house when people know you used turkey instead of beef they dislike whatever you make. But if I keep my turkey substitute a secret then they never know the difference and they love it meanwhile I've made a healthy choice for them. Whiney turds.

I'm not entirely comfortable posting the recipe on here, since it's probably a copyright infringement (aka illegal) but you can probably find it on the site, or you could email me and I could just scan it and email it to you. The ingredients, plus two eggs, are here:


Aside from the meatballs being a bit overdone (I should really know better than to cook them for the length they tell me too, but not-done raw meat freaks me out) and there not being really enough sauce to keep them moist (two teaspoons on each? please, that was BY FAR not enough and I even doubled it)...


...they were actually really good!

And plus, if you put them on a red plate with a golden underplate, it makes them look all special...


And one is definitely enough, but I made a salad to go with it. I ate probably 3/5ths of mine, but that's just me.

Other than that, today is Thursday, and we're hoping to find out about the woah thing.

Immaturity: it never dies

A conversation held over lunch at work:

A: "How much will you give me if I can stick this whole sandwich in my mouth?"
B: "I'll give you two dollars."
A: "You'll seriously give me two dollars if I stick this whole thing in my mouth?"
B: "You have to stick it all the way in and close your mouth."
C: "That's what she said.."

And I'm no better, because I laughed my butt off. Oh well. It's the little things. :)

I've been kind of absent, I know, but I have been kind of absent from everything else too. I'm having a hard time not talking about the 'woah thing' at all, so I'm just not talking. That's fair, right? ...just agree, we'll both be happier.

But I'm also been sick since Saturday, and am currently on my third dose of DayQuil in 11 hours. I'm sure that's destined to sound like a casual suicide attempt, but I hate when my illnesses get ahead of me and 6 hours between doses just seems harsh. Plus I give it less time since all the medication in this house is expired sometime between January 06 and January 08. Personally I think it works better (which may or may not be a cover-up for "im too broke to buy a whole new set of medication").

It's not the flu, though, which is both bad and good. No chance it's swine flu if it's not the flu, so I still have to go to work and class. However, it appears that people with swine flu are really being alienated as if they're carrying the bubonic plague...which is rather stupid, since the regular flu has always and will always kill more people than any swine flu will. Deal with it, germophobes.

Booked the DJ on Friday.
Went to Oktoberfest on Saturday.
Laid in bed sick from 330 on Sunday.
But, honestly, decent weekend. Other than the rain, of course.

Oktoberfest Caricature.
Ignore the random white spots, it must be from the camera flash.